I could sing of YOUR love forever. I could sing of YOUR love forever.

I am truly amazed by the LORD's power. I am truly in awe. I can't believe how blessed I am. Though sometimes I feel that I am not worthy of it, I know that because He died for me... I am some special being.

Grabe! I can't of anything else to say but thank you. I can't express how wonderful this feels basta, thank you na lang. Those two words aren't even enough to show you the depth of how I am feeling. I am so amazed at your marvelous power. Grabe!

LORD, super salamat talaga. I can't believe that I passed this stage of my education as a Nurse. Super overwhelmed talaga ako! As in! I mean passing the Microbio is one thing. Pero, passing the Battery Exam - that is super wow na talaga!

You see, guys, the Battery Exam that I took (which was taken on the same day of Pacquiao and Morales' fight) was not an easy thing. Actually, the questions were UPCAT type na mas madali pa, pero ang catch is time pressured ito. Four part test ito. Sort of confident naman ako sa first three parts, pero, nung sinasagutan ko na yung fourth part bigla ba namang sinabi nung proctor na 15 minutes (or is it 20) na lang. Eh, super dami pa ng hindi ko nasasagot. Mga around 20 - 40 items pa. Eh, abstract reasoning na mataas ang degree of difficulty pa naman yun. Kaya nga that time, nung super under pressure ako, sinabi ko na lang na, "LORD, kayo na ang mag-takeover sa hands ko. I-guide mo na lang kung anong circle ang i-shshade ko." Tapos, alam mo yun, talagang hindi ko na binasa yung mga questions. As in super ni-lift up ko na lang talaga lahat kay LORD. Talagang, ngayon ko na-realize na it was not me answering the Battery Exam. There was this higher being guiding me all throughout. Grabe! Super wow talaga ang powers ni LORD! Woohoo! Testimony to!

Tapos, parang yung MICRO. Alam mo yun. Hindi talaga ako yung tipo ng student na super duper aral sa subject na yun. I only study for 2 hours fora a certain exam (which is hindi sapat sa mga MICRO concepts). Tapos, nag-aaral lang ako that morning. Hindi talaga ako makapaniwala. Pero, pagdating naman ng mga major exams... nag-aaral na talaga ako. Hehe! Pero, wow talaga! Super grabe itong blessings na 'to!

Dahil dito sa mga biyayang natanggap ko, I realized a lot of things. Muling na-affirm yung love ko for GOD and yung faith ko sa kanya. That, eventhough I might lack the qualities of a good student, with ORA et LABORA, I can do anything. God is so powerful... that ang Divine interventions niya ang nag-papasa sa akin. Grabe!

I bring back all the glory to you.

LORD, thank you for the blessings. Salamat dahil pumasa ako sa removals sa MICRO. Sana po bukas, sa pagtanggap ko ng mahiwagang envelope, nawa'y mabuting balita din ang dala nito.

I made a lot of realizations from this nerve-wracking experience of taking the removals exam. First, I am so lazy. And, I need to change that. Second, I am very proud of myself. Tsk... tsk... Baguhin din yun.

I am truly humbled by this experience.

That in all things GOD may be glorified.

Next, please take notice of the flickr badge on thee left side of the screen. Nice pics noh! Syempre, litrato ko yan. Hehe! Thank you Leo for introducing me to this flickr thingy.

I am so loving country music right now. That is because of Bucky Covington. He's not the best singer but, I really like him. I like the songs he sings in AI5. I love the songs that they're singing.

My Bets for AI5:

1. Chris Daughtry
   
2. Mandisa
   
3. Kellie Pickler (I don't like her voice but she's very charming.)
   
4. Bucky Covington
   
5. Elliott Yamin
   

I love the songs: Drops of Jupiter, Real Good Man, I Don't Wanna Be. All of these were songs that were sung on AI5.

God, help! Thank you for all the blessings!

You can never be too happy in this life.

First and foremost, I would like to congratulate my sister for graduating with honors in St. Scholastica's College. Take note: Silver Medalist yan. Hehe! Proud sister! She truly deserves it. She worked hard for it. Her GC-ness paid off. :)

And, although I am truly happy for my sister, a sort of bad news ruined my mood. I learned that I am going to take removal exams for Microbiology. Not bad, actually. I mean, its better than Failing. But, I feel so inferior. I know that I could've done better. But, there's no crying over spilled milk. What's done is done. And, all I can do is strive to be better this removals, which by the way will be harder according to our professor.

Lord, help! I know you won't leave me.

Pero, pwede iyak muna ako. Nahihiya ako sa magulang ko. Waah! :(

okay, what i'm about to write is downright senseless... i'm so frustrated, angry, and everything else i don't want to hurt anybody with what i'm about to say.

i worked so hard para sa churva namin. but then si ms. churva to nth level ay nag-walkout chenes sa amin without cheverling our side. what's frustrating is that si ms chuva ay hindi man lang naging mas-open minded to hear our side. chuva talaga!

i chuvster worked hard for this. everyone did. and walk out? damn you!

buti pa ang micro... aminado ako ay super pabaya ako churva sa subject niya. but then again, i know in my heart, i will pass the subject. alam ko na ilang madamdaming pag-aaral lang ay okay ako. i know it. i just know it. churva talaga!

hay....

serious na ako...

may quote akong nabasa... ang ganda.... may this help me and all those who are frustarted with life and problems...

As you go through life may this forever be your goal: Look upon the doughnut and not upon the hole...

Your Stripper Song Is

I'm" a Slave 4 U by Britney Spears "I'm a slave for you. I cannot hold it; I cannot control it.I'm a slave for you. I won't deny it; I'm not trying to hide it." You may seem shy, but you can let your wild side out when you want to!

What Song Should You Strip To?

You Are Los Angeles

Young and fun, you always know where the best parties are.And while you tend to keep things carefree and casual...You certainly can glam it up when you need to. Famous people from Los Angeles: Tyra Banks, Jake Gyllenhall, Freddie Prinze Jr.

What American City Are You?

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have high conscientiousness. Intelligent and reliable, you tend to succeed in life. Most things in your life are organized and planned well. But you borderline on being a total perfectionist. Agreeableness: You have high agreeableness. You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly. Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone. You give people the benefit of the doubt and don't mind giving someone a second chance. Neuroticism: You have medium neuroticism. You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic. Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy. Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is medium. You are generally broad minded when it come to new things. But if something crosses a moral line, there's no way you'll approve of it. You are suspicious of anything too wacky, though you do still consider creativity a virtue.

The Five Factor Personality Test

glowing inside (?) by nikki gil

happy, to let you know
you make me glow
i feel so good its true
so glad that I have you
you love me so
now all is bright
i'll always

thank you for the glow
i thank you for the joy
thank you for the love
you gave to me
i’m glowing, glowing inside
with your love shining through
i thank you for everything you do
i'm glowing inside because of you

remember my growing years
they're filled with joy
because you're there for me
you cast my fears away
you wipe those tears
you give me strength each day

i thank you for the glow
i thank you for the joy
thank you for the love
you gave to me
i’m glowing, glowing inside
with your love shining through
i thank you for everything you do
i'm glowing inside because of you

who knows what tomorrow brings
my glowing wings
you make me fly
i reach and now i touch the sky
because of youi'll soar up high
so i must

thank you for the glow
i thank you for the joy
thank you for the love
you gave to me
i’m glowing, glowing inside
with your love shining through
i thank you for everything you do
i'm glowing inside because of you

Fast, update...

Thinking about celebrating my birthday in Red Box with my college friends. Omigosh!

Shoot! Visual Aids for the family. I'm screwed. I haven't finished it, yet.

Another, we still don't have our script for our Literature project.

Oh wow. This is so frustrating. I just learned two days ago that my midterm grade in microbio is 70.48. Seventy point forty-eight nga ba? Ah, ewan. Basta mga ganun lang. Hindi pasado. Waah! How am I ever going to pass second year? Grabe! Will I ever be a nurse?

Gustung-gusto ko ang teleserye na Mga Anghel na Walang Langit. As in! Super palagi akong na-totouch. Lalo na yung mga scenes ni Nanay Lusing at ni Gigi. Super! Wala lang. Na-iinspire ako. Alam mo yung innocence tsaka simplicity sa isang bata. Ah, basta! Iba. Sana ma-extend pa sila. Matatapos na kasi, eh.

I'm thinking of spending my birthday with my college friends in Red Box Greenbelt? Wala akong pera kaya yung mga highschool friends ko, on hold muna. Hehe...

Gift ko!

Anyway, Yung Dream of this site paki-puntahan for gift ideas.

Okay, back to things that are totally mind-draining - Acads. Ewan ko ba! Ay naku! Super ang daming kailangang gawin, ang daming gastusin, ang daming bagsak, konti ang pinapasa. Ewan ko ba!

It was a very long day - worthy of chronicling, actually. But, it was so long that I'd rather have memories of it in my head. Maybe tomorrow, I'll write about it.

Okay, some random thoughts about today.

I made a wrong decision of wearing my plain white shirt instead of wearing the SNA shirt. See, I brought my SNA shirt but my jeans' button is broke and I was just worried that when we are hiking, my fly would be open and it's happy valentines to everybody. And, that SNA shirt is tight on my chest. You know naman, well-endowed.

I feel that our block doesn't deserve our adviser, Sir Messiah Dela Cruz. He is just so lenient and very approachable. He is #3 on my list: "Who I want to be my HC Adviser". He's just so... so... nice. And, we are so pasaway! We so not deserve him. Napaka-bait niya, eh.

Sermon galore sa unang araw ng community. We were reprimanded and scolded by two CIs - Sir Poten and Ma'am A (Forgot her name...) and somehow they struck a chord in me. Made me reflect on our way back to school.

I realized a lot of things... So many things... (This one I'll write tomorrow or on Friday)

Haven't seen the latest episode of American Idol.

Tomorrow's another hell day. Unit exam sa Micro - one chapter lang pero super haba at ang dadaming mememorize-in na mga gamot. Sh*t! Tapos may long test sa MicroLab. Di ko maintindihan yung mga nireport previously. Sh*t!

One helpful act I remembered from the TV series LOST:
Jack: "I only let 10 seconds of fear get through me. After that, my fear - its over." (not the same words but that's the gist of what he said)

I miss my mom.

Right after watching the new commercial of Vaseline - yeah, the one where Nikki Gil is singing the 'jingle' of a sort of mini-movie which chronicles the relationship of a mother and her daughter (with exaggerated straight and shiny hair) - I cried. Well, not cried. A degree less than crying.

I miss my mom so much.

I remember my high school graduation - which was the worst graduation one could have. Both of my parents were not here during that time. Can you imagine how terrible I felt? I mean, although, I have no awards which they could be proud of, its just a nice feeling to share your accomplishments with the people you love.

Nikki Gil has such an angelic voice. It gives the ad a more dramatic feeling. I don't mind the lengthy commercial.

But, I still use Head & Shoulders for my shampoo and Palmolive Naturals for my conditioner. :p

I had a great time cheering for our college yesterday in the inter-college sports event.

Well, panalo lang naman ang nursing sa volleyball girls, cheerdance, and basketball boys. I don't know about the other events but I am so proud. To hell with CBA. Ang yayabang! Na-technical foul nga! Hehe...

Lord, what is the reason behind what happened today? Why did you let that happen? What do you want to teach us from that tragedy?

In case you're hiding under a man hole and don't have a tv, you probably won't know that around 70 people died today from a stampede in Phil. Sports Arena a.k.a. Ultra in their hopes of winning something from the first Anniversary of Wowowee.

I was on my way to school when I heard about that tragic news. During that time, only 20 people were reportedly dead on the scene due to the stampede. I thought that was the end of the deaths but boy, was I wrong! Twenty people is tragic. Seventy is devastating.

God, I can't explain how depressed I am feeling right now.

Those people waited for almost all of their lives just to get a chance to win something. They hoped for a life-changing moment. And, I guess, that's what they got.

I just feel so depressed. Depressed as in, my-heart-is-bleeding-figuratively kind of depression. Why Lord, did you let this happen? Help us find the reason why? Are you testing the people behind Wowowee? Gosh, what is the reason?

This is so frustrating. Argh...

I love watching Wowowee. I find it very... entertaining... and charitable. Although, I get irritated by some of Willie's green jokes (which, I personally think have been mild compared to what he's done before), I really find the spirit of sharing and giving very much alive in their show. Its very inspiring to see the 'richer' Filipinos give a little of what they have to the unfortunate Filipinos. The TFC subscribers giving dollars without hesitation is so inspiring. The contestants just asking for what they need and not asking for more is... Inspiring.

The show has inspired me to want less and give more.

And, of course, eventhough the network hypes their goal of giving to the poor (which I sometimes find annoying), I don't mind. Both networks (ABS CBN and GMA) do the same. They act as if they are the only ones who should help other people. Puh-leez. Can we just get along?

Another related story...

On my way home tonight, the people inside the FX were talking about the tragedy in Ultra. What pissed me off was what the lady said. It was bashing the show. I mean saying negative things about it. In my mind, I was like, " Tumigil ka na nga. Buti nga tinutulungan yung mga mas mahihirap." If I were out of my mind, I would have gone ballistic and shouted at her. Jeez!

Can we just get along?

Pwede tama na ang network war? Kasi, kung hindi dahil diyan hindi naman i-eexploit ng both networks ang poverty ng mga Pilipino.

I feel bad. So bad talaga. Hindi ko ma-explain. I feel bad for ABS CBN because they should've known better how to handle a great deal of people. I feel bad for the people behind Wowowee because all they wanted was to help (and, of course, win the ratings war), but their intention was not enough to save lives. I feel bad for Willie because... I just feel bad for everyone.

All I can do is write about it and pray for everyone.

This is so disheartening. I am crying right now.

I am super high right now, I can't even explain. I feel like I am under a drug and I can't seem to stop thinking about Carol Banawa and whether she got through American Idol 5 or not. I saw today the auditions in Austin. And I saw her. She had a short exposure. Around 3 seconds. But I wasn't able to see the actual auditions. And, I didn't know whether she got through or not. Argh... I am positive that that's her. I saw it on the AI's site. Gosh! I'm going gaga over this thing. I do hope she got through. She definitely has a chance.

Please check http://www.idolonfox.com/photos/?cat=1&sub=14&pic=6459"> this and ">this for her pictures.

If that won't work just copy and paste this:
http://www.idolonfox.com/photos/?cat=1&sub=14&pic=6459
http://www.idolonfox.com/photos/?cat=1&sub=14&pic=6475

Did she get through? I am praying she did.

I am so addicted to Dreamofthis . I found this site through Yahoo! because I was searching for a convenient wish list site which is easy to use, can be used in any site and looks cute. Right now, I already selected around 60 wishes which I hope those who know me will get for my 18th birthday. (Hint! Hint!)

Most of those wishes are expensive but, who knows my richer relatives could pitch in and buy me that MacBook Pro.

Try it! You'll get addicted to it. Hehe...

Anyway, I went to Quiapo Church this morning to pray for my father's medical exam... He's not finish yet, according to him. I hope he does fine. Please pray for him...

I had mixed emotions tonight.Well, I was able to talk to my friend from elementary (co-Kulasa) - Stephanie Hazel Arroyo through IM. We talked about school and all that stuff. Nothing much, really. And although I feel happy for them, I felt bad (again) about myself. I felt bad that I am not able to reach my full potential. I don't know. Maybe, its just me and my insecurities.

Yeah! Whatever.

Choi, taught me this new 'conio' statement, "I know. Right?" When you do it the conio way it should sound like this, "I know. Righ?" I don't know how to type it but I am sure you know how that sounds.

I am really having fun doing this wish list thingy. Its so cool to have all your wants in a site and your friends, family, anyone - rich or not so rich - could see 'em. And, maybe they could buy you those things. Sweet!

Iris made me realize something. I still don't have a plan for my 18th birthday. No big deal for me. I mean, my friends and I could just eat out (hmm, in Cabalen or TGIF, maybe?) or stay in a hotel (Westin, Intercon) or perhaps, just go to EK. Worse, in Star City. Talk about being a woman.

Sheesh!

Is it really needed to have a big birthday party? I mean, we don't have a lot of money. Y'know got to live by our means. Pwede bang i-cash na lang para makabili ako ng MacBook Pro.

Ah, ewan. What will be, will be.

Sh*t! This is so inevitable. Grabe! I can't believe it.

Jecca an I are going to meet on Friday. Excited na ako.

I am currently craving for Siomai and Indonesian Fried Rice.

Keeping my fingers crossed for Felicity Huffman as the Best Actress for Academy Awards on the 5th of March.

Finally, I can breathe... Or so I thought.

The interview that I had today was fine. It wasn't a breeze but, I think I did fine. Well, except for some grammatical mishaps. Argh... I can speak good english naman. But, when I am in such a stressful situation is either I speak my best english or my worst english. Let's just say I was neither but leaning to the worst. Got it? Whatever.

The 3 panelists who interviewed me were Sir Mes, Sir Trieste (?), Sir Ayen (?). I think I am one of the few who were lucky enough who weren't grilled on Anatomy and Health Care stuff. They asked mostly about my personal life, which I am not ashamed to talk about. Duh?!? This blog is evidence that I am sort of shameless.

Disclaimer: What you're about to read is not verbatim. I sort of altered some and I sort of remembered most of the content.

Panelists: Tell us something about yourself
Kaye: I love reading books, watching tv, watching movies. I have a happy family who loves me dearly. And, i have a strong bond with my sister....
P: So, are you the eldest?
K: Yes, I am. My sister is 10 years old. (And, my sister is 12 years old. Totally, mental drift.)

And then, in the course of conversation we landed in this topic,

P: Since your mother is working in Canada and your father is a seaman, what do you do to be the "head of the family"? (Yeah... my english is bad)
K: Well, everytime that the money we have at hand doesnt fit our monthly budget, I make sure that everytime we borrow money I see to it that we pay them as soon as I receive our monthly allowance. I make sure that our house gets paid. My sister's tuition fee gets paid. And, all the other expenses gets paid.

Blah... Blah... Blah...

I personally think that I sounded mature enough to handle the stress. And here is my personal favorite...

P: What is your greatest fear?
K: I don't want to be alone. I don't want to be left behind.
P: What will you do if you have little time to spend with your loved ones because they are leaving you?
K: I'll make the most out of the remaining time and tell them everything that I want to tell them. Like how much I love them.
P: What do you do when you are stressed out?
K: I read the Bible.
P: Why?
K: I feel that sense of security after reading the Bible. I feel re-assured that everything is going to be okay because I know that God is there for me. And his promises makes me feel secured and safe, no matter what the situation is.

And, there are some major screw-ups...

P: Do you know any characters from the Looney Toons?
K: Yes.
P: If you were to choose between RoadRunner and Coyote (then, my face starts to shift from a smiling one to a confused-naive-who-the-hell-is-coyote kind of look), who do you think resembles you the most?
K: Huh? I am not familiar with them.
P: Coyote is the one chasing RoadRunner.
K: Ahh... I am really not familiar. Can I choose another character?
P: Okay. (Sounding like why-did-you-say-yes-and-omigosh-you-don't-know-who-roadrunner-and-coyote-are kind of tone)
K: I am like Bugs Bunny. Because he has this certain positive outlook in life. Which is very much like myself. He ends eating his carrots. (I really think I sounded stupid while saying this. But, I think I sort of pulled it off with my blah english)

Over all, I think I did a good job! Thanks God for everything!

Okay, I lift everything up to God. So, whatever HE wills. I gladly accept.

I realized something. Its never too late for anything. And, I should give myself more credit. And, I am somebody. I am capable of facing anything. Gosh! This interview has taught me a lot.

i am so tired from yesterday's rendezvous in lucena. tiring but fun.

tomorrow is my interview. can't wait to get crushed by the panelists' teeth. they think i'm yummy because i am so transparent and very emotional.

God help!

still in the process of making my wish list...

Before I forget, Martina Hingis was already out of the Australian Open. I'm rooting for Maria Sharapova. And, Kobe Bryant with 81 points. Gosh, I love them!

I want to get back and play tennis with my dad.

I am ecstatic! When I log on to Yahoo! I was super surprised because Manny Pacquiao is on the top of the Buzz Log. He's no. 1. He's the most searched Sports related item. I am super proud. Finally, I a Filipino in Yahoo!

I went to National Bookstore and I saw another book by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. The title is something... something... Memory of My Whore... I can't remember the title but I find it interesting. I wanted to buy it but its too expensive - 900 bucks.

Jeez!

Tomorrow will be the last test of my midterms. And, I am going to have a hell of a weekend to celebrate freedom from midterm stress.

My friends and I are going to Quezon to film our Literature project. And, after finishing that project... Diretso na kami sa beach! Beach nga ba yun? I'll reward myself with Lays and Cream Cheese combo, a new CD, and a new book.

To crappy things, I will be having my interview on the 31st. And I don't have a smart casual attire. I need to buy slacks, long sleeved top with collar, nice shoes, and make-up (hiram na lang ako!). Sheesh!

God bless! God help!